perhaps i found a new passion.

Today I partook in an essential activity to any girl's life. I saw yards of tulle, thousands of sparkly beads, dozens of dresses in even more colors, and multiple brides-to-be. Yes, that's right: I went bridal gown shopping with my precious friend Alysha. Alysha gave me a gift that I hope everyone has at least once in their life. I get to be her maid of honor in December as she weds a guy who is perfect for her in many ways. As Alysha and I started discussing flowers, cakes, locations, dresses, who to invite (and more importantly, who NOT to invite), and so many more details, I realized the truth that I have always kind of known: I LOVE WEDDINGS. Not just love as in I enjoy going to weddings, looking at magazines, dreaming about my own. Don't get me wrong, I love all those things. But I love looking at the bride hold her hand out to show off that lond-desired ring. I love the emotion women emit when talking about wedding ideas, past weddings, and what happens after the wedding. I love to dream about my own special day - a day that while I cant wait to partake in, I equally don't want to wish for it because then it's over. And that is sad.

Weddings equal excitement for a life of companionship and love, sadness at acknowledging the young ones have grown up, desire knowing the night to come, and faith that no one could love you more than the person next to you at the altar. So much peace and passion and love comes from one day. Some ceremonies last less than half an hour (such a travesty to me!) but even just those thirty minutes bring so much to the table. I'm the girl who cries at EVERY wedding. I have even been known to cry at weddings when I know neither the bride nor the groom. It's too big of a moment, an experience, a story to me to NOT recognize with the purity of tears.

For example, I recently saw the new bridal comedy, "Bride Wars". This movie is a must see. It has a fabulous cast and is truly funny. Like the funny that makes you smile after you stop laughing because it's just that good. Anyways, it was at the wedding part of the movie when it hit me. One of the brides has no father to walk her down the aisle and no mother to help her button up the gown. Her best friend is not speaking to her (more like disposing of artillery on her) and her other friends are stuck between having to choose friends. She doesn't even have her fiancé because he's at the other end of the church WAITING for her. She's alone! ON HER WEDDING DAY. That realization, triggered by a slightly humorous moment, brought the water works! I mean, not only did I cry, I SOBBED. The kind of cry where even just thinking about it the next day makes you start crying all over again. Well after the movie had ended, I continued to have tears dripping from my face. It wasn't a pretty sight. But the thing that gets me, in retrospect, wasn't that I was hit by some depressing story and there was no hope. I was hit with the spirit of thanksgiving that I still have all those important relationships in my life. I was hit with the acknowledgment that, even with the most expensive and beautiful wedding, without the people who love you and have made your life complete, you're wedding is nothing more than frivolity and dress-up.

As I watched my dear friend and many strangers imagine themselves in satin and lace on the day we all look forward to, I remembered the need for relationships. The need we have to experience life WITH people. The big times in life are nothing when you have no one to share them with.

Back to the title of this post, I know now what I love. I love weddings. Not for the money put into them or the beautiful dresses or the mushy love songs. My passion comes from knowing the past - the story of how the couple met; the present - what this wedding and marriage mean to them; and the future - understanding the need to share life with your special someone. It's so much more than the dress and the cake (blasphemy, I know!). But then again, those are pretty good perks :)